Bad night

We had a terrible night.
Chad fell.
A lot.
A few of the falls were definitely seizures.
The others were him being disoriented in his own home.

I am so exhausted.
He is so bruised.

Yesterday, in the few moments before his meds kicked in, he looked me straight in the face and said, “this sucks.”

It does.
It sucks.

There are no words to accurately depict the emotions, exhaustion, anxiety and desperation.

None.

So sucks will do.

I feel like my girls are being punished for being kids.
I’m constantly telling them to be quiet or ushering them off to another room to play quietly by themselves.
I am not able to mother them right now, and that breaks my heart.
I cannot handle mothering them when I am constantly hovering & mothering my husband.

I certainly hope today is a better day.
It hasn’t started off well, with Chad falling several times since midnight.
But there is always hope.

Right?

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7 Responses to Bad night

  1. Tracidove77 says:

    I am so sorry that it was a bad night! But there is ALWAYS hope! We will continue our prayers for you guys! Love to you!

  2. sip says:

    love you, skye. (hugs) always thinkin' of you guys.

  3. Nicole Caldwell says:

    Praying for you as always but especially today.

  4. Allisonbjames says:

    And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

    There is hope and an abundance of love! Praying for you all.

    Allison James

  5. Jphillips says:

    Skye,
    You are the most amazing mom that your girls could have because you love their daddy beyond measure. Continuing to pray for you all daily.

  6. Savvygrace says:

    There is always hope Skye.

  7. carla says:

    I know there is hope. Your tunnel is dark right now. But there is hope even in the darkest of tunnels. Your children will understand. They might be frustrated and impatient with mommy, but I know they will understand.
    I agree. Both Ryan and I say there are no other words but “this sucks”.
    ((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))

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